


Open Interval

by PartridgeOnAPearTree



Series: Transversal [28]
Category: Dangan Ronpa, Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Alternate Universe, I'm so sorry for the delay, IT'S HERE NOW, M/M, SORRY OMG I FORGOT TO POST THE HOPE LOG AT FIRST, Uni murdered me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-29
Updated: 2016-10-29
Packaged: 2018-08-27 15:35:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,284
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8407198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PartridgeOnAPearTree/pseuds/PartridgeOnAPearTree
Summary: But if he were to be honest, accepting this conclusion instead of deeply rejecting it like earlier felt like a step in the right direction.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Statistical hypothesis testing type one error: Rejecting a true hypothesis  
> Statistical hypothesis testing type two error: Accepting a false hypothesis
> 
> Project Hope Log: http://partridgeonapeartree.tumblr.com/private/152458482087/tumblr_ofsydqnOZH1s8t9gp

Komaeda angered Naegi recently.

 

While Naegi said that everything was alright already, that he hadn’t been angry in the first place but instead just hurt, Komaeda still can’t keep the idea from his head. Naegi’s probably just being nice because he doesn’t want Komaeda to worry anymore—and it’s probably true that he has been hurt indeed—but Komaeda’s pretty sure that he really has been angry.

 

Each time Naegi smiles at him and runs his fingers through his hair just like the usual, Komaeda just feels an overwhelming sense of guilt. He can’t believe that he even contemplated leaving _this_ —this peace, this serenity, this wonderful feeling of being cared about.

 

Hope has always been his priority, yes, but if he's with Naegi, then he doesn’t doubt that one way or another, they could create hope together.

 

\--

 

“Is it good?” Komaeda eagerly watches Naegi’s reaction as the latter chews on the curry that Komaeda gave him. Naegi shortly nods as he swallows, smiling afterward. The smile causes Komaeda to smile too, his chest warming up right away.

 

“I really like it. Did you make it yourself?”

 

“Ah, haha… Not really.” Komaeda lightly scratches the back of his head. “I don’t really know how to cook, see. Sometimes I get lucky and create something edible, but even then, it still looks so terribly ugly I wouldn’t even think of presenting it to you. I just bought this one because you liked curry, and I think it’s the best I had so far… You just have to taste it.”

 

“If it’s something you made, I'm sure it’d taste good.” Naegi says as he scoops some more with the spoon. “Here, you should have some too, Nagito-kun.”

 

“Oh, no, haha, I bought it for you… It’d feel wrong for me to take some of what's supposed to be yours.” Komaeda smiles. “I appreciate it though. Thank you so much.”

 

“Come on, I insist.” Naegi smiles back. “It tastes good, really… but I'm sure it’d taste even better if I share it with you.”

 

“Alright then.” Komaeda’s cheeks start to feel warm when he hears that. “I can’t possibly refuse you when you say it like that…”

 

Naegi was right. For some reason, the already-delicious curry tasted even better now. The truth is he decided to buy that curry for Naegi because he really wants to make small steps every day to make it up to Naegi after what happened last time.

 

Naegi looks so sincere smiling at him like this. The guilt eats away at his heart each second that passes by.

 

\--

 

The dorm room felt ridiculously empty ever since Hinata left. Each time Komaeda’s in the dorm, his last conversation, if it can be called that, with Hinata replays in his mind, as if to add to the constant guilt that never leaves him.

 

And what hurts him even more is that Hinata didn’t try just once that day. In fact, Hinata tried twice, yet Komaeda still completely ignored his efforts. And thinking about everything that Hinata said then, Komaeda just couldn’t feel anything but confusion and possibly a tinge of worry.

 

Because no matter what he tells himself to rationalize this whole situation, he already knows that he's been thrust into a situation that he doesn’t completely understand.

 

Something here is more than what meets the eye. That’s what he can say for sure despite his limited knowledge. If there's something that he doesn’t know, normally, he’d go and try to learn more, but if he does that in this situation, he can’t help but feel that he's going to upset someone that he cares about.

 

Upsetting people is one thing, but upsetting people he actually loves is another.

 

So he lets the situation restrict him and watches as his guilt flourishes.

 

\--

 

Komaeda knows that there's no way that Naegi would lie.

 

Komaeda also knows that there's no way that Hinata would lie.

 

But currently, they have opposite claims, and the easiest way to deal with this is just to dismiss it as a misunderstanding like he always does. After all, that’s what distracted him from his confusion and worry all this time. Everything’s just a misunderstanding. This will all be fixed. Naegi and Hinata just need to sit down and talk, just the two of them, then they’ll finally understand each other better. As a result, Komaeda would understand them better too.

 

But now Hinata isn’t even around anymore. Hinata apparently got expelled, and Komaeda didn’t even have the chance to say goodbye. This also means that Hinata couldn’t sort things out with Naegi as easily anymore.

 

Thinking about this situation usually makes Komaeda uncomfortable. He’d conclude each time that ‘it’s just a misunderstanding’, but at the moment, it feels even more uncomfortable to end this with that conclusion.

 

Maybe he really has to think about it now and finally stop running away because he knows that that was what he was doing all this time.

 

\--

 

_Komaeda, whatever he told you—I don’t know what he told you, but still I'm sure—whatever he told you, it’s not true. You have to believe me._

 

_< I think Hinata-kun is going to return to your shared room already. If you encounter him on the way, don’t talk to him. He's just going to lie to you. You have to believe me.>_

Both sides are claiming that the other is lying. That might be one of the biggest reasons why this situation is so difficult to analyze. But Komaeda wants to start thinking about this while holding on to the assumption that none of the two are lying.

 

So the reason why both of them are thinking that the other is lying is because there might be a misunderstanding that something else aside from the two of them must have caused.

 

Hinata was insisting about a pen.

 

_Naegi lent me a pen. I used it because he told me that it was yours._

_< He kept on insisting that you gave me a pen and that I lent that pen to him, but I swear I don’t know what he was talking about!>_

If Hinata firmly believes that Naegi lent him a pen, and Naegi doesn’t know anything about that pen whatsoever, then maybe someone else caused Hinata to believe that that pen is related to Naegi. Someone probably just relayed to Hinata that Naegi is trying to give him the pen, and that same someone also is the reason why Hinata believes that Naegi claimed the pen is Komaeda’s.

 

At least something that Komaeda knows for sure here is he himself doesn’t know anything about that pen, and he most certainly didn’t lend both Naegi and Hinata one.

 

There was someone else who gave Hinata a pen, but they wanted him to think that it was from Naegi instead. Not only that, they also wanted Hinata to think that Komaeda actually gave Naegi that pen.

 

Neither of those is true. Whoever that person is, they wanted to mislead Hinata and lead him to think ill of both Naegi and Komaeda.

 

Naegi panicked and agreed that Komaeda gave him a pen in hopes of Hinata finally giving the situation a rest, but instead, Hinata suddenly started asserting that Komaeda never really gave Naegi any pen in the first place.

 

< _So then I thought that maybe if I just say yes that you really did give me a pen, he would finally decide to give it a rest and just go home… but then when I did, he suddenly started insisting that you didn’t really give me a pen at all!_ >

 

That’s something that Komaeda is sure is true, so he can confidently say that Hinata is right about that claim. But what Komaeda doesn’t understand is why would Hinata insist that Komaeda lent Naegi a pen only to take it back afterward? Especially when he seems to adamantly and sincerely believe it too during that time in the dorm when he even got mad at Komaeda?

 

With the assumption that neither Naegi nor Hinata lied, then the only explanation that would make sense is that maybe, halfway during Hinata’s confrontation with Naegi, he realized that there must be no way that Komaeda gave Naegi that pen. Hinata was on the right track then, right track to not believe whoever was aiming to mislead him, but instead, Komaeda committed the mistake of claiming that he lent Naegi the pen when he really didn’t.

 

He's not blaming Naegi. He understands what panic does to people. It’s just a shame that they must have done exactly what the mastermind wants them to do.

 

He doesn’t understand why, but the mastermind’s objective must be to create conflict between Hinata and both Naegi and Komaeda. What's a possible motive for that? What can someone possibly gain for doing something like that?

 

Someone might want Hinata to keep away from them, but why? If it’s jealousy, if it’s someone who wants Hinata for themselves, then that’s just won’t make sense because it’s not like Naegi and Komaeda are the people he spends most of his time with. Creating conflict between Hinata and Souda would make more sense because these days, they're the ones usually together compared to Hinata and Komaeda or Hinata and Naegi.

 

Amusement is always an option. Someone could be just amused because of watching conflict, but why the three of them specifically? There are a lot of other people that the mastermind could have chosen, but it was them, so maybe the three of them have something that the others don’t have.

 

Komaeda would think it’s because Hinata and Naegi are both exceptionally amazing people and that maybe, he just got caught in the middle, but no. This situation definitely concerns him because the mastermind made sure to say that the pen is owned by Komaeda originally.

 

What is it that the three of them have that others don’t?

 

…Ah.

 

Ah, that must be it.

 

All of this must have been caused his luck. His bad luck, specifically.

 

He was so unlucky that he caused this trouble for both Naegi and Hinata. He was so unlucky that some mastermind who maybe wants amusement decided to target the three of them instead of just anyone else.

 

That’s a possibility. He can’t believe that this can possibly be his fault again. He really can’t do anything right.

 

An uncomfortable feeling of guilt makes itself known again within his chest.

 

Or it could also be someone who hates both Naegi and Komaeda that they found the need to estrange the two of them from a friend they both value a lot.

 

People hating Komaeda is nothing new, but with Naegi, that sounds practically impossible. There's nothing to hate about him. The only person who showed something with the semblance to dislike for Naegi is Hinata and that’s because whoever this mastermind is decided to bastardize Hinata’s impression of him.

 

If it’s someone who must have animosity for Naegi though, then it might be a dislike fueled with envy. A lot of people could be envious of him, but who could do something like this?

 

Komaeda sighs.

 

He needs to know more before he can conclude something.

 

\--

 

Komaeda wakes up to the sound of knocking on his door.

 

His first thought was that it was Hinata, and thinking of that, all traces of sleep within him was suddenly gone. It’d normally take a few minutes before he fully gets up, but the thought made him rush straight to the door, his heart beating fast in anticipation.

 

His hope deflates when he sees someone else—someone unfamiliar, even—and nothing but confusion takes its place. “Um… Hello. May I help you?”

 

It was a woman—possibly early to mid-thirties—and despite never seeing her before, Komaeda receives a warm smile from her. Something about it seems sad, and although Komaeda doesn’t understand how and why, he can’t help but feel… a little sad too.

 

“You must be Komaeda-kun.” The woman says. “I'm Hajime’s mother. We’re just here to get his things.”

 

“Ah, oh. I’m so sorry for standing in your way.” Komaeda immediately opens the door wider and steps aside. “Is Hinata-kun—Hajime-kun—with you?”

 

“No, he’s not. I’m sorry, Komaeda-kun.” She smiles apologetically as she walks inside, and Komaeda feels bad because the sadness in her eyes seems to have become more visible. "I told you too that I’ll tell you once he gets back, but it completely left my mind..."

 

“It’s alright. Please don’t worry about that. Is there anything I could do to help?”Komaeda pauses. “But, um, only if possible…I really would like to talk to him. I was trying to call him, but I couldn’t reach him at all… I understand if you can’t tell me, but did he mention anything about being upset with me? We didn’t really part on good terms..."

 

“The two of you had an argument?"

 

“Well… Not exactly an argument.” The one-sided conversation flashes through Komaeda’s head again, and the guilt then was terribly painful to bear. “It was completely my fault… He didn’t do anything wrong.”

 

“I’m sure, whatever it is you think you did, Hajime has forgiven you already.” There was that smile again. “He didn’t mention anything bad about you, so I guess it’s safe to assume that he isn’t ignoring your calls on purpose. Actually, you know, whenever he mentioned you, he always said good things. He said that you were always looking out for him… always being the one to check if he already ate his meals because he always overworks himself…We’re indebted to you, Komaeda-kun. Thank you for taking care of Hajime."

 

“No…I don’t deserve your thanks at all. I didn’t do anything special.” Because he really didn’t. He wasn’t treating Hinata the way Hinata deserved. In fact, he thinks he has treated Hinata quite poorly. Hinata is so kind to paint a beautiful image of Komaeda to his parents. They probably think he’s such a great friend when in reality, Hinata could have had so, so much better.

 

“Hajime thinks otherwise. He always says something about you being his best friend.”She continues speaking. “I can tell that he was really fond of you. Even if he doesn’t tell me exactly how much, I can tell.”

 

“That’s… really flattering, but I don’t think I deserve it.”

 

“I’m sure he thinks you do. You’re very important to him…Sometimes, I think, he’d even choose you over me and his father if he really has to make a choice.” She lets out a laugh. “It’d be bad to think you don’t deserve it when that’s the case, wouldn’t it?”

 

“Haha, if you put it that way…” Komaeda lets out a sheepish laugh too. “But still… I don’t think he’d do something like that. We may be close, yes, but you guys are still family.”

 

“Family…”She repeats. Komaeda decides to sit across her when she takes a seat on the floor. “I really love Hajime. He’s my one and only son. Everything I do is for his happiness and wants… I always make sure to find a way to reconcile those two intentions. Never… I’d never want anything bad for him.”

 

“I know… I believe you, Mrs. Hinata. He also says that you are a caring mother.”

 

“I’m a caring mother…” She repeats, as if in a daze. “That’s right. I’ll never ever… want anything bad to happen to him.”

 

“…Is something the matter, Mrs. Hinata?”

 

“I just love my son so much… I only want to support him in everything he would want to do. I just want to help him achieve whatever he would want to achieve.”Something about this is deeply unsettling. “…Do you think there’s anything wrong with that, Komaeda-kun?”

 

“I… don’t think so.”Komaeda carefully says. “You only want the best for him. I don’t think an intention as pure as that will ever be wrong.”

 

“So you understand… that whatever I do, whatever I support him to do… it’s for him, all for him.”

 

“ Yes, I understand…”

 

“He always works so hard.” She continues. “Always pushing himself to the limit… until he gets sick, until he just passes out in fatigue. If he finally gets what he wants… he’ll stop doing those destructive things to himself.”

 

“Yes, I worry about him too… I really wish he takes care of himself more.”

 

“Komaeda-kun,” She places a hand on his. “…Did you love Hajime?”

 

“Um,” Komaeda blinks. He has anticipated a lot of question that she can possibly throw at him, but that wasn’t part of his expectations. “…I’m sorry?”

 

“Did you love Hajime? Because I think he loved you.”

 

“Um, I…” Komaeda’s starting to feel overwhelmed. He doesn’t understand fully the things that are going on, and he badly wants to try and learn more but he doesn’t even know where he has to start searching. Just when he thought he’s finally starting to achieve a little bit of peace regarding the whole deal with the pen, this explodes in front of his face. “I don’t… understand why you’ll say this, with all due respect. As far as I know, Hajime-kun never held that kind of affection for me. But if you meant it platonically, then I apologize for misunderstanding.”

 

“You seriously believe that, Komaeda-kun?”The hint of sadness that Komaeda kept on seeing earlier in her eyes was more visible now. There was no room for doubt. “You must be so dense to think that…”

 

“I don’t think it’s good to assume something like this, Mrs. Hinata…”

 

“I’m his mother.” She replies, retracting her hand. “The thoughts he thinks—he doesn’t have to tell me for me to know. Even the ones he hasn’t even thought yet… I’ll still know before him. I don’t _think_ he had feelings for you, Komaeda-kun. I _know_ he did.”

 

“I’m sorry… I admire the fact that you have such a deep understanding of him. However, I really can’t bring myself to agree with you, especially since you weren’t… really here to see us every day. Please understand that I’m not trying to be rude—“

 

“I don’t need to see you two every day for me to know.” She interrupts. “Did Hajime give you a gift recently? For an occasion, maybe?”

 

The sudden question was confusing, but he does his best to scan his memory anyway. The last one he received from Hinata was the cat stuffed toy that Hinata worked so hard to get during their trip to the arcade. That stuffed toy that reminded him so much of Naegi. Komaeda can also remember Hinata saying that he wanted to make it up to Komaeda for the Day of Hope with that prize he got.“Yes… He gave me a stuffed toy. He tried a lot of times to get it for me even if I told him it was fine.”

 

“A stuffed toy.” She repeats. “…Did he give you anything else?”

 

“No… To be honest, he doesn’t really have to waste his kindness on me. The stuffed toy was more than enough.

 

“He was working so hard to get you something…”She continues. Komaeda’s confusion was made known to himself again. “He got a job sometime a few months ago, didn’t he? He wanted to give you something… something that he put a lot of time and effort on.”

 

Komaeda can remember clearly. Hinata going home late every night, studying every morning after he wakes up from his short sleep to make up for the time he lost, suffering from fever, muscle ache, and headache…insisting to go to work even if he had to stay in the infirmary the whole day… Komaeda knew Hinata was working hard, but he can’t believe that it was for him.

 

“…There must have been a misunderstanding because Hajime-kun didn’t really give me a gift on the day itself. Are you sure it wasn’t for someone else? Hajime-kun is one of the kindest people I know, but I’m sure even he knows that I don’t deserve that kind of effort…”

 

“He wanted to give you something.” She repeats. “He told me himself. He even asked me to cut his allowance so he could use it in advance. If you’re not going to trust the other things I said, you can at least trust me here. He wanted to give you something.”

 

“No way…”

 

His head is starting to hurt. He just wouldn’t believe that. There’s no way he could, but he couldn’t keep the memory of Hinata talking to his mother on the phone that time, saying something about " _but that’s, like, next week! Please, I’ll just make it up to you,"_ and somehow, everything seems to fit perfectly. His head hurts.

 

“He loved you so much.” She says again. “And you didn’t even notice.”

 

“…That’s because he didn’t love me. If he did, it must have been as a really important friend. I know I'm not worthy, but he did always say that I'm his best friend… Please, I’d like to make clear that I don’t intend to be disrespectful to you in any way, but I think you might have misunderstood a lot of things regarding us.” Komaeda furrows his eyebrows. He still feels lost, but he’s trying to set things straight in his mind. “If you’re looking for someone whom he might have liked that way, I could direct you to some of our classmates. Personally, I thought it was Nanami Chiaki-san, but I think—“

 

“You really won’t believe me no matter what I say.”She interrupts again. She almost sounded impressed. “Is it really so unthinkable?”

 

“Hajime-kun has never expressed that kind of interest in me, and our relationship has always been nothing but platonic.”Komaeda replies. “I’m really sorry if I disappointed you.”

 

“He would have wanted you to know.” She says, that sad smile returning to her face. “I just never thought you won’t believe me. Anyway, thank you for your time, Komaeda-kun. I’ll handle Hajime’s things myself. My husband is on his way to help me, so you can go back to sleep if you wish.”

 

“Thank you. It was my pleasure to talk with you.” Komaeda bites his lower lip. “Please, if it’s not too much to ask… please don’t forget to tell him to reach me. I’d really like to talk to him again.”

 

“I do hope…” Her smile hurt. Komaeda doesn’t even understand, but he could clearly feel it. “…I do wish you get to talk with Hajime again.”

 

“I’m just worried, I hope you won’t think I’m meddling, but… is Hajime-kun really okay? You seem… really sad about something. Of course I could have misread things completely, and if I did, I apologize…”

 

“Thank you so much for your concern, Komaeda-kun.” That was all she said.

 

\--

 

“What are you thinking about?” Komaeda was pulled out from his thoughts by a soft hand on his. The fingers of the hand gently intertwine themselves with his, and when he looks up, there was Naegi, worriedly watching him. “You’ve been quiet ever since the day began… I’m really worried about you. Do you have a problem?”

 

“Nothing, I just…” Komaeda forces a smile. He doesn’t want to worry Naegi at all. “I talked with Hinata-kun’s mother today, face to face this time. She just said some things that I found quite… unsettling, I think. I’m not too sure if that’s the word I’m looking for.”

 

“What did she tell you?”Naegi looks so concerned for him, for Hinata. Komaeda wonders what he did to deserve the good luck of meeting someone so caring. “How is Hinata-kun doing?”

 

“She told me a lot of things… I hope it doesn’t upset you, but honestly… the thing that occupies my thoughts the most right now is her… firm belief on saying that Hinata-kun has had romantic feelings for me…” Komaeda bites his lower lip. “Not like that would change anything between us! I mean, I don’t even believe that’s true—I’m sure she might have confused me with someone else one way or another. It just wouldn’t leave my mind at all… and as for Hinata-kun’s safety, according to her words, he seems to be doing okay. But really, I can’t help but notice that she seems to be sad about something…”

 

“I see.” Naegi nods. Komaeda couldn’t read the expression on his face. “I’m happy to know that Hinata-kun really is okay. But anyway, about your other concern… Why are you thinking about that?”

 

“It’s just a really unthinkable concept for me, so I’m just so surprised to meet someone who firmly believes it. And to think it was Hinata-kun’s mother too… but as I said, it’s not like that will do anything to us. I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable by thinking about it so much.”

 

“No, it’s okay. You can think of anything you want to think about. Though I _am_ a bit worried, sorry… You used to like Hinata-kun, after all. Is this knowledge making you rekindle your old feelings for him?”

 

“Not at all! Please don’t think that…I already told you that I’m very happy about our relationship. I couldn’t even imagine being with anyone else. Besides, I already decided that I’ll just do everything I can to be the best friend for Hinata-kun. I’m incapable of thinking of him romantically anymore.”

 

“Suppose it’s true though… Let’s say Hinata-kun did like you. What will you do about it?”

 

“I don’t know… If he doesn’t tell me, then it won’t feel right for me to actually do something. So it all just depends on the actions that he’d take too, I think…”

 

“Then let’s say he confesses to you. Like, right now. He calls you and tells you that his mother was right, that he really loved you all along. What will you do about it?”

 

“That’s impossible, but… going along that hypothetical situation, then of course, I’m going to have to reject him. I’m already with you, and I’m happy with you. You’re the person that I like…”

 

“Let’s say we’re not together then. Would you have accepted his confession?”

 

“I don’t think so…It won’t feel right. I have developed an infatuation with you from the moment I saw you. So even if we’re not together… I’d probably still be admiring you from a distance.”

 

“That’s flattering.” Naegi places a hand on his own chest. “Then I suppose I’ll be admiring you from a distance too.”

 

Komaeda feels warmth on his cheeks. “Really? I didn’t possibly catch your attention the way you did to me… I mean, it’s not like I stand out.”

 

“Did you forget? I was the one who first talked to you, right? That’s because you caught my attention.” He smiles. “Now that I think about it, maybe that hypothetical situation was really farfetched, after all. I mean, I’m sure… that no matter what it takes, I’ll see to it that I’ll get closer to you and have you by my side.”

 

“And to add to that… I’m sure my good luck wouldn’t let me not get close to you either.” Komaeda allows himself to say even if he’s feeling a bit embarrassed. “It’s the only thing that I have, but I have complete trust in it… so maybe, we were meant to be in this situation. No matter how impudent that sounds coming from me.”

 

“It’s not impudent at all.” Naegi laughs. “I’m happy that I was fated to be with my good luck charm.”

 

\--

 

Not that Komaeda aims to blame Naegi, but he admits that he gets distracted a lot when he’s with the other. He thought he should open to Naegi the possibility that someone else might be the reason why Hinata believes that it was Naegi and Komaeda responsible for lending him the pen. Normally, he wouldn’t really want to voice out an idea that he isn’t even sure about, but he thought that maybe Naegi would have some information that can strengthen or debunk his hypothesis.

 

But whenever he’s with Naegi, everything just feels so peaceful that he forgets it whenever he has something worrying to bring up. Unless prompted, of course, like earlier.

 

He makes a mental note and promises himself that he has to ask as soon as possible.

 

\--

 

“Makoto-kun, would you like to go somewhere tonight?” Komaeda smiles as he asks. Naegi smiles back at him, and Komaeda makes sure to not forget what he wants to talk about. “I kind of don’t want to go back to the dorm yet… Hinata-kun’s things aren’t in the dorm anymore, and it feels kind of empty to be there right now."

 

“Oh.” Naegi frowns. “I’m so sorry…Enoshima-san and I have someone to meet tonight. If it would help, I can ask some of my friends to keep you accompanied for the mean time, then I’ll make sure to come be with you as fast as I can. Unless, of course, you want to hang out with your classmates instead? I’m really sorry, Nagito-kun.”

 

“Oh, it’s okay. Please don’t apologize. I wouldn’t want to bother any of your friends or my classmates, so I’ll just wait for you somewhere else if that’s alright with you.” Komaeda pauses. “I’ll wait for you in that restaurant that sells mochi. Is that fine?”

 

“The thing is…I don’t really know what time we’ll be done. I wouldn’t want the restaurant to reach its closing hours with you still waiting alone.”

 

“Thank you so much for thinking of me…” Komaeda’s chest feels so pleasantly warm when he hears that. “I’m fine with that though. I just don’t really want to go back to the dorm right away. I’ll text you when I decide to return.”

 

“Alright, be careful.” Naegi places a soft kiss on his cheek. “Make sure to tell me if you go elsewhere.”

 

\--

 

“Don’t you want the last mochi, Hinata-kun?” Komaeda remembers asking the first time he went to a restaurant to eat mochi with Hinata. Hinata raises his eyebrows then as he shakes his head.

 

“I don’t really like sakuramochi. You can have it if you want.”

 

“Oh, you don’t?” Komaeda slowly nods as he takes the remaining mochi. “Well, it’s not a favorite of mine too, but I’m okay with it. Why don’t you like it?”

 

“Too sweet for me, I think. I don’t know if you noticed, but my favorite is kusamochi.” Hinata stares at his eyes then. “You know… um, the color of your eyes reminds me of it, actually.”

 

“Oh.” Komaeda can remember that he must have blushed that time back then as he does his best to maintain eye contact. “That’s a flattering comparison… especially since it’s Hinata-kun’s favorite.”

 

“I’ll probably remember your eyes now whenever I think of kusamochi.” Komaeda didn’t know if he was just imagining it that moment, but Hinata actually looked embarrassed when he said that. “It’s a shade that I really like…”

 

“I thought it looked like disgusting sewage water, so that means a lot to me, haha.”

 

“You really should stop talking about yourself that way.”

 

“Haha, sorry! It’s just really true, you know.”

 

“Well, if that’s the case… I guess I like the color of sewage water then. B-But anyway,” Hinata looks around the restaurant. “I’d buy another box of kusamochi. Would you still want some?”

 

“Alright!”

 

\--

 

The things Hinata’s mother said earlier—Komaeda probably would have been so happy if he heard them last year. Of course, he’d probably still conclude everything as a mistake, but he knows that there would be a big part of him hoping that it’s true. Right now, though, if ever those things end up being true, things will just be confusing.

 

If Hinata really _did_ like him, since when did he? Why? And why didn’t he say anything?

 

Besides, there really is just no reason to like him. Actually, up until now, he wonders why Naegi is still putting up with someone like him. Hinata is surrounded by so many of their beautiful classmates—beautiful not just because of their outside appearances, but also because of who they are and what they can do with their talents. Komaeda couldn’t even compare to any of them even if he tries.

 

And he can also remember clearly the reason why he decided to stop liking Hinata in the first place. That certain night—Hinata asked for his advice regarding confessing to the person that he liked. Komaeda doesn’t think Hinata would ask him of all people if he really is the one Hinata is talking about. And if ever by chance it really was him, then Hinata should have gone ahead and said it that time because that was the advice he, the one apparently concerned in this, gave. However, Hinata didn’t do anything like that.

 

As for the gift, if it’s true that Hinata worked hard and was planning to get him something, then it doesn’t make sense that he didn’t give it to Komaeda that day. Not like Komaeda thinks that he deserves a gift, but that night, Hinata was so genuinely apologetic for not having anything. He even repeatedly apologized for that fact. To add to that, Hinata wouldn’t have gone the trouble of trying again and again at the claw machine if he already had something else ready.

 

And if Hinata really did, he would have told Komaeda that he was leaving. He didn’t have to say why, he doesn’t have to say anything too detailed, but Komaeda knows that Hinata wouldn’t have accepted going without saying at least a short goodbye. Though that could easily be Komaeda’s fault too because of his behavior during the last time Hinata tried to talk to him. But still, Komaeda knows that Hinata would have brought it up even as he pretends to not listen.

 

There are just a lot of things that wouldn’t make sense if Hinata did like him.

 

But probably, the things that wouldn’t make sense the most are the things that _would_ make sense, so Komaeda decides to remain on this line of thinking.

 

\--

 

_I guess I like the color of sewage water then._

_Just the mere thought of lying to you… it hurts me already._

_I want to tell you that you're amazing._

 

_Your support must be one of the reasons why the test went smoothly for me._

_It’s_ your _support. And I think that’s what makes it effective._

_Can you stop talking like you're not important or something like that?_

_You're the most soothing person that I know._

_I was just in the dorm room… waiting for you to come back._

_I hope, once I get the results, we’ll still be able to hang out like this._

_If I do get good results, and I tell you everything… About myself. About the person that I like. I hope—I wish… I wish we’ll still be able to hang out like this._

_What's not to like about you?_

_Even if you say it now and not tomorrow morning, I know I’ll still keep them in mind as I'm answering the questions._

_Obviously, you don’t know how much I care about you, Komaeda._

_I care about you so much, hell, I think I might even be willing to do anything for you!_

_That’s why I don’t appreciate you saying that I am disinterested in you because honestly, I never ever did lose interest in you._

_I never ever stopped caring about you._

_You're the one who gives me hope._

_If you're going to be amazed at anything, you should be amazed at yourself._

_You giving me hope mean so much to me._

_Your eyes kinda do that thing. Whenever you're sad._

_I can’t really tell you right now._

_But I do want to tell you. I swear I do._

_I'm just not ready to tell right now._

_If there's someone who I really want to know about it first, it’s you._

_I want you to know everything._

_We’re supposed to give gifts to people who give us hope, right?_

_I'm really worried about us right now._

_I'm so glad you're here._

 

_I miss you so much._

 

_I don’t care what we do as long as we’re together._

 

_You know I can never hate you even if I tried, right?_

_You're both really perfect._

_I do think you're perfect._

_If you were the one who'll receive a confession, how would you want it to go?_

_Please just let me hold you right now._

_You’ve always been so kind, you’ve always been appreciative of me, and that’s why I—_

Komaeda remembers that time—how Hinata looked like as he seemingly forced himself to pause in fear of saying something he might regret. He remembers all the times Hinata held him, held his hand, as if letting go would make Komaeda disappear right after, as if he needed to hold Komaeda as tightly as he could or else he’ll fall apart.

 

And lastly, Komaeda remembers _that_ overly realistic dream—that dream where he felt Hinata’s lips pressing against his forehead—and he realizes that that dream might not be a dream at all.

 

\--

 

Komaeda doesn’t know why he's thinking about this. There's no reason to think about this. It’s not like he’d want to do anything to address it—he already made clear a lot of times before that he's happy in his current relationship—but he can’t deny that this whole deal made him feel an inexplicable twinge of loss and regret.

 

He doesn’t understand.

 

But if he were to be honest, accepting this conclusion instead of deeply rejecting it like earlier felt like a step in the right direction.

 

He hopes it’s the right direction, indeed.


End file.
